Eight years ago today, I gave birth to my second child; my second boy, Drew. I hate even saying this, but his birth was probably the least exciting of the three. There are many good reasons for this, but I still to this day feel guilty even thinking that, and I try to make it up to him by giving him extra hugs and loves. It's not like he even knows, but I still don't want him to think he is not as important as the others, or that I wasn't as excited when he was born.
I went into the hospital on a Monday morning and spent all day there. My cousin worked at the clinic and she came down to visit for a bit. We played cards and chatted. It was kind of boring. Nothing was happening. The contractions weren't getting any closer together or stronger.
One thing that sucked was my midwife was not able to hang out with me at all. One of the other midwives was sick that day, and she was taking over her clinic patients as well as taking care of me. Another thing was the fact that my husband could not find the Bob Dylan mix tape I had made specifically for the occasion. We listened to U2 instead.
Finally, they broke my water and things started to pick up. I went to the shower for a while, and sat on the birthing ball. Todd rubbed my back, and said, "You know, honey, if I could trade places with you right now...I wouldn't."
Ha ha.
Things got really intense and painful. The nurse was annoying me. I kept asking for the midwife, but she was busy. I was considering pain medication...I was feeling a little panicky. The nurse went to get me something for the pain when I felt the strong urge to push. Suddenly the midwife was there and they were getting things ready. I pushed for seven minutes and out came a baby boy. The nurse exclaimed, "Wow, that 's a big baby!" It was 7:12 p.m. Sue was holding him, and she asked me what I saw. I said, "It's a boy!"
I held him for a brief moment, then they snatched him from me and put an oxygen mask on me. His face was blue, but he was okay. He weighed 9 pounds 3 ounces. We couldn't believe he was so big! I couldn't get over how pink he was, and how light his hair was. Garrett had been such a dark baby. Drew looked just like his daddy. He nursed for the first time, and Todd took a picture. I called my mom, and Todd called everyone else. It was snowing quite heavily outside, and the only person who could make it to see the baby was my mom and step-dad. They didn't get to hold him, though. The nurse was concerned because Drew's blood sugar and temperature were both low. He wouldn't wake up to nurse again, and she thought it was because of his blood sugar. She fed him a bottle of sugar water and took him to the Level 2 nursery for observation. I was wheeled to my room with no baby in my arms.
We visited him in the nursery, under some warming lights. He looked huge near the other babies, especially the preemies. During our stay, we had many comments about how big he was, but I didn't think he was that big. He was just a beautiful little baby.
I finally got settled in my room around 10 p.m. and took a bath. I noticed that I was bleeding a lot more than I remembered bleeding the first time. I tried to sleep, but I was having the most horrible cramps...a nurse came to check on me and I told her about the bleeding. I tried to walk to the bathroom, but became very dizzy. The nurse pushed me on the bed and called for the midwife. It hurt so bad...every cramp felt like having contractions again, and I could feel the blood gushing out of me. The midwife arrived, and she pushed on my abdomen until I was screaming in pain. I will spare you the gross part...but after she cleared all the clots, I stopped hemorrhaging and I felt much better.
I was put on an IV, and some nurses cleaned me up. I could barely keep my eyes open, I was so exhausted. I finally fell asleep around midnight...and around 1 a.m. a nurse turned the light on and brought Drew in. He was awake and he was hungry. I was so excited that he wanted to eat, and that he was okay. Needless to say, I never did get to sleep that night. Never in my life have I ever been that tired, that physically exhausted, and I hope it never happens again. I was weak from blood loss for days.
One funny story I like to tell from my hospital stay was when a nurse brought in a nursing student. This woman was seriously wide-eyed and nervous. The nurse was talking to her about breastfeeding and when the woman's milk comes in. She asked if they could feel my breasts. "Uh...okay," I said. With gloves on, the nurse pushed on my breasts and showed the girl where the milk glands were starting to fill up. The ridiculousness of the situation hit me then...I was totally getting felt up by two nurses! "This side must be your favorite side," the nurse said, feeling my right breast. And yes, it's my favorite one. I always nursed more on that side because it left my left hand free to do other things. Oh, right boob, how much I love you...
I remember Todd bringing Garrett in to see his little brother, but he didn't seem to care. He was eating a cookie and got crumbs all over my bed. When they left, I started crying. I was holding a new baby, and he was fussy, and I was exhausted. I didn't know how I was going to handle two kids.
But I did...
Drew, you are such a joy to have in my life. You give the best kisses and hugs. You are great at drawing pictures. You are so smart, but in a quiet, subtle way that always surprises me. Your brain works in ways that are sometimes hard for me to understand. You make me laugh. You have such a big heart. I want to give you a good childhood with happy memories. Thanks for letting me be your mom.
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