Shifting

It is really warm here for Minnesota in the winter. Right now my computer says 48 degrees Fahrenheit. The piles and piles of snow are melting. It's wet, muddy, damp, slushy, and foggier than hell.

I feel the shifting inside me...if I just sit and concentrate, I can sense it and feel it almost like a physical ache, but I can't really explain it. And of course, now I will try.

Today I was sitting in Composition class, and our desks were in a circle as we listened to people read their latest papers. I joined in the circle, as I always do. The smartest and most annoying kid in the school was reading his paper on percussion instruments, and it read just like a text book. A long one...I could sense the fidgeting around me as people's attention spans started to fade. There was some general murmuring and sighing, but the teacher was doing her best to look seriously interested. It was warm in the room; it has been warm in the school since the heat is still running. I could see the light from outside shining in the windows, and feel the fresh air from the window that someone opened a crack. It occurred to me as I sat there that my senses were a lot sharper than they have been...I could see things brighter and clearer, sounds were louder, I could smell the air, the people were more there. I looked around the circle at all of the students, and it felt like I was coming alive.

I pulled a piece of paper out of my pocket on which I had written a list of things to do today. Every single day I write a list in English class, and 99 percent of the time, I never look at it again, and end up washing it in my pants. I turned the list around, and began to write some notes. There was a tinkling of an idea entering my brain for my poor book that has been neglected. I have felt stuck in one spot and unable to move. I am still not sure exactly what will happen, but I do know that right now in the book, it is spring. Maybe I needed to get a taste of the spring-like air to inspire me to breathe life back into my characters. Damn, it feels good to be alive.