Pizza

Yes, what you are seeing is real. Grace is eating a piece of pizza. With crust made of wheat. Sauce made with tomatoes. And cheese on top. Dairy cheese. Cheese from a cow. Really.

Let me just say first of all that I am glad that Grace is growing out of some of her allergies. Life has been infinitely easier since she has been able to tolerate more foods. I have been able to relax my defenses, stop staring at her face when she eats to see if she is getting hives, stop bringing food for her everywhere we go. Now she is eating dairy with no adverse reaction whatsoever. And she is thrilled. She ate a slice of cheese from the refrigerator and asked if she was allergic to it. I shrugged and said, "I guess not." She ate it and then looked at me with wide eyes. "I'm gonna eat some of the boys' pizza!" And so she did.

But I have mixed feelings about this. Although I am thrilled to death that there is no danger for her while eating dairy, I do not think that dairy is a wonderful thing to be eating. I also feel a little sad. For so long, she has been eating my food with me. She has been like an extension of my own body; we have been tied together. I was the expert on her allergies, knowing even better than Todd what she couldn't eat. I made food for both of us to eat, and we would quite often eat off the same plate while she sat on my lap. I watched out for her and took care of everything and she needed me. I feel like she is slowly growing away from me; something that is inevitable, I know, but still makes me feel a bit sad.

But I know she will always need me and will always love me. And she will still eat tofu stir-fry with me, and she will always love hummus and guacamole and chicky-peas and fruit smoothies. I can still watch out for her health by encouraging nutritious food. For now, we still have to watch out for peanuts and eggs, but those are much easier to avoid than all the other foods she was once allergic to. She's growing up.